Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Putting the "PRO" in PROCRASTINATE!

That title really does sum up how I work. I have always been a "wait to the last minute and then let's do this!" kind of gal. And I usually come out smelling like a rose. You know, I do my best work at the last minute. Some examples:

  • I have a chapter of writing due for an action research paper, I am sick and on meds, and it is now 2 pm and my chapter is due at midnight. Wrote my best chapter, ever that night and made the deadline!
  • Uh Oh! People coming to the house in an hour? The place needs to be cleaned, vacuumed, dusted, shampoo rug, repaint walls (went a little to far on the reality road, huh?) ...Well you get my meaning. I can churn out a full on house cleaning lickety split...if I have people coming over. 

This brings us to my present last-minute-to-do-but-still-come-out-smelling-like-a-rose situation. Getting everything needed to be done before you leave on a trip and you only have 5 hours to do it. 
And go...:
  1. Dr. Appt
  2. Spare key
  3. Allergy pills for Gavin
  4. Pack
  5. Put out trash for "trash day"
  6. Visit with sister
  7. Call folks and tell them I love them. You know, just in case, like wear clean underwear incase you are in an accident.
  8. Triple check itenerary
  9. Love up on Gavin
  10. Make a playlist on iPod
  11. Get snacks
I am sure reality will smack me upside the head and give me a wake up call on what I can and can't do. I will be lucky to get 5 of those things done.

That is ok. I am going to do what I can and move on to enjoy seeing something on my bucket list! This means I am going to take a lesson from our favorite...eCards! 

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Tuesday, July 23, 2013

The Lessons I am Learning about Failing

I have come to terms with this decision (which was totally out of my hands) but I still need to write it out. You see I was hoping to make a lateral move at school. There was a position I heard was going to be open. Actually, doing the same thing I am doing now but with more responsibility and a much wider audience. Then it happened.  Someone from the campus I wanted to move to made a play for the position and scored it.

I had my head wrapped around this position for about two years. I would have been awesome at it and would have moved the program forward. I thought I was a shoo-in. The principal knew me and knew I wanted to move over there. As his last hurrah, he placed someone with no experience into the position. Now I could fall down in a heap of misery or I could just trust God.

See the old me would have wallowed. Oh, how I would have wallowed and rolled around in the misery of it. I would have put so much pressure on myself because I am a perfectionist. By not getting the position it would have been so easy for me to think negatively of myself, to feel like a failure, to beat myself up for not making it happen. But that is the old me. The new me, which is a work in progress, is seeing a new light, a new way of thinking, a positive warmth of this experience.

Positive warmth? What the heck did my fingers just type? Yes, they really did that. Huh. But it is true. I feel that even though I did not get this position, I have done everything in my ability to make it happen. I put myself out there and outside my comfy cozy box to give myself every opportunity. But I am ok with not getting it. I believe there is something better, more fitted for me and my future.

Maybe I need to stay to see (and help) my two "boys" finish their high school this year. Maybe I am to stay to bring the Flipped Classroom I am piloting into a more permanent existence. Maybe I am being groomed to move to a totally different position. Heck, let's really go out there in la-la-land and say Lt finally asks me to marry him and we end up moving to a different city! Ok, you didn't have to laugh so loud at that one! LOL! I thought it was pretty humorous too!

Or maybe this is a way for me to be less critical of myself, to accept the flaws within me, to embrace the vulnerability I encountered (I hate being vulnerable!) and to see that it is ok to not be perfect and fail and still come out ahead. Ah, the many lessons I can learn from this experience.

All I know is I am putting my trust in God. He has a plan for me that will eventually be reveled.

Oh, and I still think I am the best person for the position. Hey, I am still me, just a little softer around the edges, not invaded by a body snatcher!

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Wednesday, July 17, 2013

4th of July...Better Late Than Never!

Ok, I know it is July 16, so this post is really really late. Better late than never, my momma always said!

Speaking of Momma....I went to Kansas to see the folks for 4th of July weekend. We flew out July 4th evening. I was pretty excited to get the opportunity to see fireworks in the sky. You really don't know how high up you are until you are looking down trying to see fireworks and can't. Finally, we were down low enough to see. It was pretty cool. Also when we landed (at the itty bitty airport), the farmer beside the runway shot off a big ol' pretty right outside my window...COOL!

This is not from my plane. I deleted my pix! But this is what it looks like.
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Then we drove the 30 minutes to get to the folks house. Every little town had their firework display going off. It was beautiful! Then we made it to the folks house. OMG! Driving through town, every house was shooting off fireworks. Not just the little kind, but big beautiful colors bursting in the sky.

We stood on the front porch and just marveled at the displays all around us and above us. And the noise! I swear it sounded like a war zone with all the pop pop pop and BOOMS! It was surreal especially living in TEXAS for the last 16 years.

See in Texas, fireworks are banned in the city. They sell fireworks outside the city limits and you can pop them outside the city limits but not inside. I had gotten used to this not how it really is in my hometown. See, growing up in Kansas, all those many years ago, there were really no rules/laws about fireworks. Oh, you can't shoot them near or over a wheat field because that is during harvest season, and you can't shoot them at anyone or hold them in your hand, but that was about it.

So travel with me back, WAY back, to my childhood and let me share some 4th of July memories.

1. Waking up early in the morning, think of early like Christmas morning-gonna open presents-early, and you get your punks ready and go out and pop Black Cats and smoke some snakes! You would be doing this all morning until lunch then it was too hot. But we'd be back out at night with sparklers and fountains and such!

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2. PUNKS! You remember these right? Those long brown sticks that stay lit on the end. Kids of all ages could use it. Just remember where you aim those things! My sister and I remembered many a time we would burn someone else or get burned because we weren't paying attention. I wonder what kids use now to light their fireworks/

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3. We had this one night time firework that you attached to a fence. When it was lit, it spun colored lights round and round. Well, the firework jumped off the fence and chased my aunt all down the sidewalk! She couldn't escape that thing! It was so funny. We still tell this story to this day. We don't let the good stories die. They live on forever!

So tell me about what fireworks is like for you either from your childhood or today. Do you have bans on fireworks in your town or is it a free for all?